This blog wasn't originally called anything, but if I had thought about it, I would have called it: Of Rice and Yen.
As a foreigner (gaijin) from a country that's not quite the United States of America, but often mistaken for the same, I am often asked about my feelings about the Japanese/Yankee rice trade.
My initial reaction, is of course, who gives a crap? But as an ambassador of Canada on the JET (Japan Exchange & Teaching) Programme, I should perhaps not speak so tersely. Perhaps irrationality is called for.
Let's see... Hmm. At every one of the seven junior high schools I visit here in Ohtawara-shi, I get to eat lunch with the students. That lunch invariably consists of cooked rice (gohan) and some other stuff.
Every day, at every school or restaurant I visit, I am always asked if Japanese rice is oishii (delicious... it's pronounced oy-she). How the heck would I know? It's rice isn't it? It tastes like rice so how can't or can it taste anything but delicious (depending on your point of view). Doesn't rice taste like rice? Isn't it all the same flavour?
Now... the zesty taste of chili con carne ala Andrew is oishii... but rice is like green tea (o-cha). To quote fellow AET (Assistant English Teacher) Tim Mould: "It's got no taste!" If picturing this, you should add an image of Tim jumping up and down in exasperation and then pouting.
It's a Nihonjin (Japanese people) tradition to inquire of the gaijin whether or not they like all types of Japanese food. It's like it's a test, to see if you are worthy of being "Japanese-like"... if you don't like something, it's because you are a gaijin, and may not have the tastebuds of a Nihonjin. Well, they may have something there.
All Japanese people swear that Japanese rice tastes much better than American rice. Really? How do they know? Have they ever sampled California rice? I swear, Japan's agrarian economy would collapse in a heartbeat if a Japanese person ate anything but Japanese rice--and woe be to them if they thought that gaijin rice was tasty.
For that matter, how many Americans know where their rice is from--and no, Rice-A-Roni, the San Francisco treat and Rice Krispies do not count.
Since I am almost from America (America Jr., actually) the Japanese are anxious to know of my opinion on the taste differences between rice varieties.
Now, while I can tell the difference between New Coke, Diet Coke, Coke Classic (remember - this is 1993, not 2010!), Caffeine-free Coke, Diet Caffeine Coke, Cherry Coke, Diet Cherry Coke, Taste Free Coke (o-cha), RC Cola, Pepsi Cola, Pepsi Free, Diet Pepsi, Spam Pepsi and several species of bathtub mold (not my friend Tim), I just couldn't explain the nuances between western and eastern rices. I think it's because of my Indian heritage (dot, not the feather), and the fact my parents would usually buy Indian rice.
Then it dawned on me - hey, I never really ate rice until I got to Japan (Mom made two meals - one for her and my dad, and one for my brother Ben and I). As well, I also recalled that Indian rice is a long-grained rice that sticks together. It has to stick together or Japan would never buy rice from India - chopsticks, you know. And why does Japan buy rice from anywhere except Japan. For crying out loud, the name of my city: Ohtawara literally means 'big-rice field-field'! That's all there is in this country.
American rice, is a smaller grained ... fruit? vegetable?... whatever it is... and it doesn't stick together... though I'm told some varieties are sticky.
Anyhow, as of now - 1993, the Japanese don't want to allow American rice into their country because apparently America sprays a preservative chemical onto the rice so that it can be safely transported.
The Japanese say, between puffs of cigarettes and sake (rice wine... sorry... Japanese rice wine) that they are wary of what they put into their mouth, not wanting to ingest any chemicals that might be harmful.
A word to the wise, people: if Japanese rice is more tasty than American rice, it may be because of the plethora of drunken men who routinely relieve themselves in the rice paddies.
Yum.
Somewhere eating bread,
Andrew Joseph
Today's title is by Fergie... mostly because she's hot. EATITUPYUM
It ain't rock and roll, but I like it.
PS: This story was originally published in the July 1993 issue of Networking magazine in Tochihi-ken. I actually got paid to write it. I know, I know... what the hell were they thinking?
PS: The photo above shows off a couple of bales of rice. Okay, they are really miniature bottles of sake designed to look like ancient bundles of rice. But, I don't have any Japanese rice around the house for a photo because the nuances of rice are unknown to me, so my wife buys whatever is on sale... usually from America Jr.'s cousin to the south.
