Yesterday, I formerly introduced you to Kikuchi-sensei, the new Japanese teacher of English at Nozaki Chu Gakko (Nozaki Junior High School, aka No-Chu). You can read about my attempts to sweep her off her feet HERE.
Failed attempts, I suppose I should say. I was never really a good sweeper.
Between Tuesday and Thursday of that wonderful week in April 1992, I tried everything I could think of to get her interested in me. Which wasn't much admittedly.
Sure, I wrote her a haiku (three-lined poem), I complimented her on her appearance, her spoken English skills, what a great teacher she was--but Kikuchi-sensei was stoic in her resolve.
Keep in mind that we are in Japan. I couldn't come in with a bouquet of flowers (or have them delivered to the school)--the Japanese, especially at work, are very reserved. I'm unsure if that's by design, or just the way everyone wants it, but that's the way it is. You can act like an ass or a giddy school girl outside of work, but at work you shut your mouth and do your job.
Now, me? I'm a gaijin. That means outsider (not even foreigner). As such, I don't have to play by the rules. I do, of course, but I pick and choose when and how I'm going to fit in like a Japanese person or stick out like a dumbass foreigner with no concept of how the Japanese do things.
Here in Ohtawara-shi (Ohtawara city), the general population has allowed me a heck of a lot of leeway. Yeah, they know I'm a foreigner, but I'm pretty out-going here. I have a good time doing whatever it is I'm asked to do, and I smile while doing it. My buddy Matthew (fellow junior high AET) who also lived in Ohtawara, was another guy who followed the rules, did things his way, and enjoyed doing what he did. It's why we got along so well, I think. And still do, 20 years later.
Sorry for getting off track there, but I wanted you to know that I did try my best to pursue Kikuchi-sensei while I was visiting the school.
I was told that culturally, women who go out with foreign men can be considered easy - the foreigners only want to sleep with you! Well, yeah, but we're that way with women no matter where they are from. And, truthfully, sometimes we do want more.
So... I couldn't be as overt about my intentions with Kikuchi-sensei as I would have liked. Because I'm who I am, and because she was such a beautiful young women, people were watching us. To see if she would dare to go out with the local Assistant English Teacher who had a reputation for really, really liking women (nudge, nudge, wink, wink)... or to see if this stupid gaijin was going to get in the way of the other single, Japanese teachers who were waiting patiently for a school party to get drunk and feel her up.
Yes, I do think like that, and I knew that I was going to have to work faster and more efficiently.
But a funny thing happened over the next three days at No-Chu.
The students all seemed to know that I was hot for teacher, and were doing their darndest to help me out. But I didn't know that until later... all I saw was that over the three remaining days, her attitude towards me was slowly changing. I actually saw her smile at me.
Y'see, the students had been constantly talking to her about me. Saying what a nice guy I was. That I was funny and handsome, smart and rich. I don't know what drugs these kids were doing, but they must have shared some with Kikuchi-sensei.
On Thursday (my last day at No-Chu for another month while I visited other schools) and between classes, I sat in the in the teacher's lounge. Unexpectedly, Kikuchi-sensei came over to talk to me, lightly put her hand on my knee while laughing at one of my stupid jokes (she also covered her mouth with her hand--it's an Asian thing women do when they laugh), and said she was impressed by how much the students at this school like me... that I seemed to be their favourite topic of conversation. (Huh... mine, too).
Realizing that this was my opportunity, I pounced! I leaned in close so no one else could hear me and whispered in her ear: "uh... ummmm.... uh... oh geez... uh..."
I pulled my head back, took a deep breath, and moved in closer again. "Kikuchi-sensei...if you have any free time, would you like to go out sometime?"
She pulled her head back quickly with a look of shock and disgust... or maybe it was because I had eaten natto for lunch. I needed a breath mint!
She waved a finger back and forth between us, asking if I meant her and me...I nodded a yes, and looked down at my shoes and said "Hai".
"Okay. I'll call you tonight," she said as she looked around to see if anyone in the room could understand English.
"I'll give you my phone number," I said, also looking around hoping that someone here could understand English so I could brag.
"I already have it."
"Nani (what)?"
Oh yeah. As a foreigner in a small town, it's really tough to be anonymous as people seem to know exactly what is going on. Everybody knows everything about you. You are a G-O-D... a gaijin on display.
To actually go out on a date, we were going to have to be creative in our plans.
Somewhere awaiting a phone call,
Andrew Joseph
PS: Today's title is by Elton John. I know, I know... I should have used Van Halen's Hot For Teacher... but I already used it last year. Man, I'm stupid. Anyhow, Elton's song has ANGST.
PPS: Next, a phone call and issues of privacy.
