My-on-aise is Takashi Tsuruno. Mis-ta An-do-ryu is on bacation andu hasu asked me to fill his oki (large) shoes. Thirty centimetres. Sugoi, ne (cool, huh?)
He didn't tell me what to write, except he say to make it funny. I think I will perhaps I will try to do my best. Maybe.
What do you like sports? Maybe basu-ball will be funny, but I don'to like basu-ballu bery much. I like the Tokyo Giants.
Sumo I hate. Bigu hate. I like Takanohana and Wakanohana and Chyonofuji. I don'to like Musahshimaru, Konishiki or Akebono. I don'to know why. Mr. An-do-ryo once told me that when the gaijin sumo players (last three mentioned) win a game, you can'to hear the crickets because they are Japanese crickets. He thinks the Japanese crickets only like Takanohana and Wakanohana, too. Of course. They are bery handsome boys.
Let'su have a conbersation together with soccer. I like soccer bery much. I play soccer when I was in a junior high school student. I play soccer ebery day. I play bench. I like soccer bery much. I like the new J-Reague bery much.
I like their hairstyles bery much. Kak-ko-ii, ne (cool, eh)? I want to cut my hair like Kazu (Kazuyoshi Miura, Japanese soccer player and 1993 Asian Player of the Year)... but, my mazur (???? oh, he means 'mother') says: Dame! (No way!). She says no one in my office has hair like that, so i can't either. She's right, I suppose. Besides I can'to afford the hair-care products.
Isn't the new J-Reague great? I went to see the soccer game in Utsonomiya (Tochigi-ken's capital city south of Ohtawara) on June 30 (1993). My mazur made me some food. I ate some tako-yaki (octopus balls, though no testicles... like the Chinese chicken balls, ya perv). I had a beeru. I had some O-zushi (sushi) and another beeru. Then I had some shiokara (squid guts) and a beeru and some ikka (squid) tempura (tempura) and a beeru. Oishiiiiiiiii! (tastyyyyyyyy!). Eberything always tastes better at the stadium.
I bought a nice basu-ballu cap and a shirt with a killa whale (it's not so tasty, but we have heard it is a part of Japanese tradition, so we have to kill it and eat it), some key chains with all of the team mascots on them that I gave as meibutsu (non-food presents) to my office workers who were with me at the game. I also purchased some bean paste in the shape of a soccer ball for omiyage (food-based presents) that I gave to my boss because he let me sit four seats to the right of him when everyone knew I should have been five seats away. He is a bery goodu boss.
At half-time when the raser (laser) light show and dancers were on, I went to one of the gift shops and bought some nice flags to wave (I hope I didn't block anyone's view!). I also got some some bumper stickers that look cute, but I can't put on my new white car, or else I won't get full trade-in value when I get rid of it next year.
The game was bery excited. My office was doing the 'wave'. We had to. Eberyone else was. We didn't want to stand out like a gaijin. I don'to remember who won, because I don'to know who was playing. There were, however, lots of deer horns and JR train men pointing at invisible signs (Kashima Antlers vs. JEF United, I believe). I like Mitsubishi Red Diamonds best because I have a white Mitsubishi car. All my friends have one. I think we work for Mitusbishi. Okay. I am finished now. Bai-bai.
Someone else,
Tsuruno Taka-san.
Title by The Who. I ask Mr. An-do-ryo who sings. He says 'Exactly' and then laughs. I don'to get it. Stupid gaijin jodan (foreigner joke).
PS - Photo - that's Mis-ta An-do-ryu on bacation in Saipan. I think we took over that island in WWII.
