I arrived here yesterday, meeting my mother Lynda, who flew in the same day from Toronto. We'll spend a few days here before heading back to Japan where she'll see the country and probably end up seeing more in two weeks than I ever will in two years (or more!).
I love Thailand. I've been here less than day and I've already slept with a 22-year-old waitress who served more than soup—more like a seven-course meal. :)- I know... I can't wipe the grin off my face. Tookta is gorgeous, and was our waitress at the hotel restaurant last night. She obviously liked my tip, as she wants to meet up again after her shift ends at 1AM.
Thanks to my mother's snoring, I'm not going to sleep so I might as well see the local sights, sounds and smells—which I find quite fulfilling.
Tookta and I both know this is just a fantasy sex call and that I'm going away in a few days, and she has no allusions about anything other than she enjoys doing what we are doing. Am I worried that she has done this with others? Yes. But one can only take precautions and must still try and enjoy life. She has assured me that she's never done anything like this before, but there was something about me—the fact that I would come to Thailand to sight-see with my mother made me seem safe in HER eyes. Heh... I guess she was worried about her own health, too!
So... having now had sex in two different countries (Japan and Japan), I still am a virgin the western hemisphere... but that is only if I want to get stupid specific. Which I don't.
Back at the hotel room, I'm up at 7AM?! and have a shower to try and wash to smell of youthful exuberance from every nook and cranny... but you can't stifle exuberance. Thank goodness.
No sign of Tootka (late shift), we have a continental breakfast at the hotel restaurant. It's free. Who cares if it's bad? It's free!
My mother has organized the day via a Thai tour guide. We have a chauffeur-driven, air-conditioned car (yes, it's white). We're not rich, but my mom does like to travel in comfort... and, if you can afford it, do it. In Japan, I did stay at a youth hostel once with Ashley... and then after that pulled out the old credit card and stayed at name brand hotel chains after that.
As we leave the hotel, the car passes a security gate - just like what you might expect to see at an army base or at a prison. The security guard is a very sexy young lady, who chats with the driver, and then peers in at the two travelers (mom and myself). Big surprise... she smiles at me and says she gets off at 6PM if I wanted to take a walk around town with her. I don;'t know how I'm supposed to walk on my back, but I file that information away for future reference. The offer was only directed at myself, by the way.
Traveling in style, we visit the Grand Palace, the Wat Phra Sri Ratana Sasadaran and the Wat Phra Keo (also known as the Temple of the Emerald Buddha). We also visit the Wat Pho (the Reclining Buddha).Photos in a couple of days, okay?
We then go to Gems Gallery International Co. Ltd.... which is a heavily armoured jewelery shop. It is surrounded by a wall, and with an armed detail (I counted 6 men with M-16s (or maybe they were AK-47s, I'm not an expert on guns--and there could have been more security that I didn't see.)
The jewelery shop and the hotel are fantastic. Security up the ying-yang, but that's because with some any tourists, the place is ripe for a picking. I've never felt safer in these surroundings, however. Heck... I also have protection. Hah.
At the shop, I purchase an 18K gold chain and a ring... but not just any ring... I purchase a 5..54 carat black star sapphire ring with five diamonds (0.12 carats). It looks spectacular. When the light catches the sapphire, it splits to make a star pattern within the gem.
Why did I get this particular ring? Blame comic books. According to noted Uncle Scrooge and Donald Duck artist and write Carl Barks, Uncle Scrooge's one-cubic acre money bin has a layer of black star sapphires lining the base. I had no idea there was actually something called a black star sapphire... I thought they had made it up... but seeing one for real... I knew I had to have it.
Yes... my rationale for blowing a large chunk of change was thanks to a pant-less old duck with a Scottish accent.
Next we are driven to a shirt making shop. We get to pick out the fabric we want (it's all silk), figure out the style and then they make it for you.
I chose a green silk shirt with purple threads; a blue silk shirt with red threads, a red silk jacket with blue threads and a pair of black raw silk pants. It costs 7000 Bhat ($225 Cdn)... but I bargained them down from 8,800 Baht ($283 Cdn). In Thailand, it's considered an insult to not bargain.
Since my visa is at the max (thank-you, you old duck!), we put my purchase on my mom's credit card. I promise to pay her back, but we both know that will never happen. Great, eh? I'm here for less than a day, and my credit card is maxed out.
Anyhow... it drizzled a little bit today, but not enough to dampen my enthusiasm for this wonderful country and hot women.
We get back to our hotel at 6PM on the dot. The security guard who asked if I would meet her at the time is happy to see me... I tell my mom I'm going to go out with Boon-mee (I swear. I can't make stuff up this good!), and that I'll see her at 8PM for dinner.
Getting out of the car, Boon-mee entwines her arm around mine and off we march into the hot sticky evening of Bangkok.
Now, I should state that she has already changed clothes, is wearing a light sun dress with underwear... but with the way we talk with each other, I'm pretty sure one or both will be off soon enough.
We go for a drink at a local bar. Everyone seems to know her - and in a nice way. And a few of the locals come over to talk and find out about me. Both men and women. It seems like she has friends here, and if she has done this before, no one slips up and says anything to freak me out.
Let me just tell you that Thailand seems to have a hell of a lot more hot women than any place I've ever been... On a scale of 10 (with 10 being the highest) It's like a Thai 6 is a Canadian 8. Tookta was Thai 9 and Boon-mee is a Thai 8. What the hell is with this country?
We finish our drink and then head out to a secluded part of the large parking lot back at the hotel... I'm a guest so I get in no problem, and she's an employee, so no problem. This is like two nights, and two women. I love Thailand and Thailand loves me. Three times this evening.
Drained, I head back covered in lipstick to my hotel room for a quick shower to wash away the evidence of date. I can't get rid of my grin, however. It's been on since I arrived.
At dinner back at the hotel restaurant, Tookta serves us again and services me later that night... thank god I have several hours to recover.
Now maybe it's because Tootka told her friends at the restaurant that we had done the deed (done several deeds), but while I was eating my dinner, I looked around and espied the other waitresses staring at me... and when catching my eye, smiling back.
Holy Kop Koon Krap! (Kop Koon Krap means 'thank-you' in That). I thought Japan was the best place to have women ask me out. Nope. So far, it's Thailand. Three encounters in two days.
How long are we staying here? I'm for three more days? Krap!
So far, none of the women seem screwy in the head. Just horny. Thailand has already begun to restore my faith in women.
I love this country!
Somewhere needing more condoms already,
Andrew Joseph
Today's blog is by the J. Geils Band: CONTEMPLETE
PS: The hotel sells western-sized condoms. I load up for here, a broad and for Japan. I buy 10 boxes, with each box containing a dozen. I have high hopes for this year, apparently.
PPS: The photo above is of the black star sapphire ring I bough in Thailand. Yup... that's the box it came in. I still have the certificate of authenticity, too. It looks like I never throw anything out, eh?
PPPS: Sorry for not having this finished properly until 45 minutes after I published it! My bad!
