White Wedding

Okay... A few days back, I posted my initial reactions to a Japanese wedding. While I was darn near exact in providing detail with what I actually saw happen, I didn't really explain things to you - probably because it was never explained to me.
Now... thanks to the Internet, one can find out whatever information they need virtually instantly. I've actually been 'on-line' since the late 70s, when I used to message board with other like-minded individuals. Having always been impressed with the power of the computer, I decided to say 'screw all that' and did some research the new old-fashioned way - with a book. To me, the old, old-fashioned way is through verbal communication... and no one does that anymore. Everyone is too afraid to say what comes to mind. Political correctness or just correctness be damned. Others, like my wife, prefer to write stuff down so that it's organized - so one doesn't come off looking like a doofus.
Obviously, I do the same here in writing down these blogs, but it doesn't stop me from looking like a doofus.
Now with what passes for humour out of the way, let me offer some insight on kekkon (weddings), that I never learned because I did not get married in Japan. I got married in Las Vegas, and you know the old saying... what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas... so I can't tell you about that either.
Okay... now I've really got the comedy out of the way.
Apparently one out of every five marriages in Japan is done via an arranged marriage, rather than the type where two people in love decide to marry each other. Some find love and marriage - others have it thrust upon them. I believe the Kanemaru's (one of my bosses from the Ohtawara Board of Education), were an arranged marriage... and they had three kids and seemed very happy.
In a kekkon, Japanese folks can have either a Christian-, Shinto- or Buddhist-style ceremony - and are usually a private gathering with close family members. I never got into that inner circle despite my good looks.
 In the traditional Shinto wedding ceremony, there is chozu, where there is a ceremonial purifying washing of the mouth and feet when they enter and after they are seated. Next, the priest performs a symbolic purification ritual called a shubatsu. Then there are prayers offered by the bride and groom's representatives, and then the sankon where the lucky couple exchange cups of sake (Japanese rice wine) - drinking three times each from three stacked sake cups brought in by a shrine maiden (miko).
The bride and groom read their vows, exchange their rings (the woman puts it on her right hand). Then they make an offering of tamagushi at the alter, and then the relatives have some sacred sake (it's all called sakazuki) showing the family bond between the two families now made one.
And that's pretty much it. Shinto is beautiful in its simplicity and sake.
As mentioned in my previous wedding blog, the reception following this is an extravagant, over-the-top affair that defies explanation, but that's why it is cool.
The wedding cost is shared by the parents of both newlyweds, so to me that makes it perfectly all right if they want to come on the honeymoon, too. And they do.
I mentioned that the bride changes clothes a few times... well, if you think it's tough to purchase a single wedding dress for that special day in Europe or the Americas, Japan has us beat.
The shinto ceremony, and the initial introduction at the ceremony has the bride wearing a white kimono called a shiromuku. Beautiful plummage. A large wig with a white headdress is also worn (I believe its a wataboshitsunokakushi and or a style headdress).
Later, the bride will change into different styles of kimono like the irouchikake and the furisode. All beautiful, and even to the casual observer, it should be apparent that all are completely different in style.
The men... they wear dress pants and jacket (the haori hakama). Pretty boring, but they too do a change into a suit, or something more casual - it is a party, after all.
And how much can these wedding ceremonies all cost? Well, a book I found from 20 years ago says: for a ceremony, the reception, honeymoon, and costs to set up a new home, it can cost about Y57,000,000 (which according to today's exchange rate, is about $85,000 Cdn.)
I know that seems like a lot, considering my wedding, reception and honeymoon was a tidy $4,000 Cdn., but it seems to be in line with the average wedding costs here in North America.
There. Don't say you don't learn anything from this blog.

Somewhere at a wedding drinking for Pete's sake,
Andrew Joseph
Today's title is brought to you by Billy Idol, and even though this song might be about drugs, it could also be about a WHITE WEDDING.