While I was riding by bike to Ohtawara Chu Gakko (Dai Chu aka Ohtawara Junior High School), I had the feeling I had slipped into a Dr. Seuss book. It was just like: And to Think I Saw It On Mulberry Street (see HERE), except that this street like all of the streets in Ohtawara-shi (City of Ohtawara) had no street sign to tell me what street I was on. It made me wonder briefly just how the mail service worked.
But anyway... what I saw: The sights, the sounds, the throngs of people... whew! I guess you had to be there. Well enough of that.
The next day, I saw a gaggle of primary school kids (Sho Gakusei - kids in Grade 1-6). I knew they were primary school kids because they said "Hello" rather than "Herro" to me... anyhow, they were gathered in the centre of the goat path that was the road... I circled around them to see what the heck they were doing and noticed they were saying goodbye kitty to a former fur x four (that's a pun on the 4 x 4 vehicle), that had apparently been hit in a hit-and-scram.
During our rubber-necking, a middle-aged mother in a small white car drove by and honked at the kids to get out of the road because that "gaijin (foreigner) might be dangerous. The kids looked at me, said "Hello" and left. I must say that although the woman's statement irked me a bit - as did seeing two small children standing on the front passenger seat of her car - something else captured my attention.
There, just above the "Kiss Me I'm Italian" bumper sticker were three sets of skis held in place via a ski rack. It got me thinking, but then, so too did the dead cat. She didn't look like she was going skiing. Was she taking the kids? No!... the skis were all adult sized. Do pirates go to heaven? When do Japanese people take time off from, work to go skiing?
I arrived at school and noticed that 39 of the teachers there had cars with skis attached to the roof of their vehicles. One even had a surfboard. An inquiry was in order.
I found out that 47% of the teachers had never been skiing., and 49% had - though it had been when they were in primary school, and 1% had heard that all Americans like surfing. The remaining 3% was a woman who says she goes skiing often - and invited me to join her next time.
Apparently most Japanese use skis, ski racks and surfboard as a means of showing off their care-free abandon.
So... weeks later when it was finally cold enough to actually be winter in Japan, I went on that ski trip. We left at 4AM in her new white car, and hit a traffic jam... as apparently all other 3%'s know that 4AM is the best time to avoid the rush.
Getting to a local course at 11AM, I squeezed my Japanese size 30 (10-1/2) foot into the largest ski boot in Japan - a 27 (Japanese shoe sizes are based on centimetres). I then popped on the skis. My friend, looked at me and laughed. She asked me where my ski suit was. I was wearing jeans and a winter coat. She was wearing... how does one describe a technicolour yawn?
I looked around and noticed the fashion (non)sense of the average (and how) skier. I guess the Japanese figured that if a golfer can do it, so too can they.
How do I describe it? Well, it's like someone took a big box of Crayloa crayons - not the 48... the big ones - the 64 with the sharpener at the back - melted the crayons (it has a melting point of 128 to 147 degrees Fahrenheit - really), turned on a fan, held a white ski suit in front of it and then dumped the coloured wax in front of the fan... and then added a violent day-glo colour.
I could be wrong... does Crayloa make a larger box of crayons?
The most interesting aspect of my first attempt at downhill skiing was watching the others to learn their techniques. I guess I didn't quite get the grasp of it as I didn't fall down and scream very much.
By the end of the day, I was getting pretty good at maneuvering around the fallen, crumpled bodies.
Hey! Maybe that's why they wear such bright clothing! It's so the ski patrol and the ambulances know where the bodies are! It also hides the blood.
By 2PM, it was time to leave, and spend another seven hours in a traffic jam because all the other skiers thought it would be a great time to avoid the rush.
Somewhere wondering who moves the dead animals to the side of the road,
Andrew Joseph
Today's title is by The Clash: You can hear it HERE.
PS: In the photo above, that's some of my Lego (I mean my son's Lego.. ahem...): A Japanese samurai wearing skis and carrying a surfboard. Banzai!
PPS: In the photo down here, that's Nobuko about two years before I met her - despite the perfect straight black hair... I prefer the more mature do she sports during OUR time together - see HERE for an example of her hair
PPPS: Notice the pink blotch in the lower left corner? Ski suit.
