Pop Goes The World

So... after a late night of binge drinking after I gave my speech to the people of Ohtawara-shi, Tochigi-ken, Japan, I am up at 6:30 in the freaking morning and not very happy.



I have to be in Utsunomiya-shi (Utsunomiya is the capital city of Tochigi-ken) by 9AM so that I can participate in some stupid JET international dance festival dreamt up by some tea-totaler with a-way too much free time on their hands.



I'm an assistant English teacher on the JET (Japan Exchange & Teaching) Programme, and have been in Japan for 15 months - and to quote Maxwell Smart (of the TV show Get Smart  - here's the opening CREDIT - god help me but I have all 5 seasons on DVD!): "And... loving it!".



Matthew, who is also a junior high school teacher like myself lives in my city, but he teaches all of the schools outside the city limits, while I have the ones inside.

Matthew, is participating... it's odd... Matthew didn't do a whole lot of participating during the first year because he was very busy chasing skirts, but he's making a big effort these past few months, as a leader... trying to help all of the other newly arrived foreigners here in Tochigi adjust. I guess we're both trying to do our part.



Anyhow... that bugger is late arriving at my apartment! He was with me last night and we were neck and neck to see who was going to have the most to drink. No one won.



Since he's late, we have to ride our bicycles like the wind to the eki (train station) in nearby Nishinasuno-machi (Nishinasuno Town). The speed at which we ride is impressive for two people who drained a bar only a few hours ago... and it makes me sweat and my knees hurt.



Just so you know... the actual dance is happening tomorrow. This is our second rehearsal.



We arrive in time for the rehearsal, which goes well. I still don't like the entire set-up. Can-can for the French, Hula for the Americans, and line-dancing for Canadians like me. I hate the dances! I'm only here to meet people.



Afterwards, we have a JET meeting to decide who should be the Tochigi-ken head representative. Susan St. Cyr abdicated last Saturday and told everyone that Gail would take over... but Gail had never even been asked by anyone, nor had she ever expressed any interest in taking over. One last screw up before leaving for Susan.



We elect Jeanne Mance Blanc from Sherbrooke, Quebec works. She is an AET on the JET Programme too, and while she lives in an apartment above Ashley (my ex-girlfriend whom I am still sleeping with. It's not that complex, really, and it something everyone should continue doing with their ex).



Jeanne is a junior high school AET like Matthew & myself, and works at the Tochigi Board of Education (Ohtawara Branch).

Jeanne was elected because nobody else wanted it. She thought I really wanted it and was surprised when I turned the offer down. besides being busy with the editorship of the Tochigi newsletter, The Tatami Times, I'm not technically a member of AJET anymore. Hmmm... I wonder how that would have gone down... me the head of the Tochigi AJET, but not a member of AJET. Hell... I should have accepted just to see what sort of trouble that would have caused... but to be honest... I'm not really an organizer... I'm a participant who takes over as a leader.



I have a couple of beers with Matthew and head for home. Ashley had left earlier so she could take part in a badminton tournament. Good for her. I had no idea she even knew what badminton was, let alone could play. I suppose that's a small reason for us not being a couple anymore... but then... getting information out of her was like pulling teeth. Getting information out of me... well... you're reading this so you know how easy it is to get information out of me.



Back in Ohtawara, Matthew and I ride to the local video store (it's immense... think about the largest video store you have ever seen and then double it in size... unless the largest one you have ever seen is the one in Ohatawara, in which case, don't double it in size).



I call up Ashley at 6PM. Apparently, she's just on her way out to go back down to Utsunomiya for a girl's night out.

Before hanging up, she blurts out that she found out this afternoon that one of her students at Ohtawara Boys High School attempted to kill himself last night after school.



She's very vague on the details (and I never ever found out any more... let's just say this sort of stuff was never discussed at my OBOE (Ohtawara Board of Education) office. Heck... I asked, but even the effervescent Hanazaki-san was reluctant to tell me anything, except to confirm that the attempt did indeed happen).

Ashley didn't really know the student, but she thinks she may have been the last person to so see him before he made his attempt. She was pretty upset. Poor stupid kid. I hope he gets the help he needs.



Off the phone, I play video games until 12AM and then head out alone to the 4C for a couple of vodka-based drinks... six of them. That's a couple, right?



Somewhere in a haze,

Andrew Joseph

Today's blog title is by: Men Without Hats, a Montreal, Canada group I used to like when I had hair with a a lot of hairspray - POP

Tip Toe Through The Tulips

Here's a tale from Gail Thompson, a very attractive young woman who was an AET (Assistant English Teacher) in the JET (Japan Exchange & Teaching) Programme with me in Tochigi-ken, Japan. It appeared in the September 1991 issue of The Tatami Times English newsletter of which I was the editor and chief onani-ist. 

Helloand welcome to everyone! So what do you think about Japan so far? Ilove it and hope you will all have a great time here. The reason I mwriting is to tell you all about the Primary/Elementary StudentsEnglish camp that was held recently (I'll assume in August of 1991: Your Way-back Editor) in Awano-machi (town of Awano), near Kanuma-shi (city of Kanuma). Steve Heyd, Micahel Pilarski (another AET: Kindda foggy Editor) and I were privileged to be asked as assistants and apart from a few interesting incidents (how ominous: Ominous Editor), we had a grand time.

Imaginea bus load of food, eight kids all nervous but excited, three verynervous board of education people (they were really nervous) and threeAETs ready to speak English or communicate in any way possible, and youhave the scene of the first morning of the camp.
We all got on the bus and headed for a mountain in the depths of Awano-machi.The ride on the bus was an adventure that I don't think Michale willespecially forget. It started off okay. We did the usual introductionsand reviewed a few songs (to be sung around the campfire that night)and the kids were really good.

However, the roadstarted to turn more and more as we slowly wound our way up themountain - and we teachers started to look a little green around thegills. But the kids were reading, eating sweets and generally lookingextremely genki ('fine': Yer Dictionary Editor).
Whenwe finally reached our destination, the kids all tumbled out of the buseagerly waiting for lunch, while we teachers crawled out with a not sogood attitude towards the prospect of eating anything for the rest ofour collective life.
But lunch was a great success, and we soonstarted our hike through some beautiful Tochigi-ken(Province/Prefecture of Tochigi) countryside. The kids weer having agreat time catching dragonflies, and we spent our time prompting themto speak English.
Steve, Michael and I looked splendid in ourblack garbage bag make-shift rain coats, as we hadn't brought along amillion and one essential things needed for a camp - and despite that,our luggage was twice as big as the kid's. Where do they learn the artof packing and can I enroll in a class??? Of course, it started torain. We abandoned the hike - well, actually the three board ofeducation peole got very nervous that the kids would catch a cold, butwe tough AETs were most willing to go ahead. FIGHT-O! (I think that isthe way the Japanese say 'Fight' - Confused Editor).
Dinnersoon rolled around and the cordon bleu Steve prepared was delicious.Actually it was red beans and rice, and we all enjoyed it. But thekids?! Let's just say they preferred the standard camping dinner oftoasted marshmallows.
Now it was time to sing our songs - Michael did a great impression of a teapot, and was the star of the show.
You would think that the kids might be a little tired by now, but no! But guess who was?
Wefinally settled down and the voices of little munchkins saying (inEnglish) Good Night rang in my ears, and I fell into a deep sleep witha smile on my face.
All too quickly, it was 5AM, and these kids(at least the girls in my cabin - who the nigh before had graciouslylaid out my futon - good girls! - were up and running.
Afterbreakfast, we carved pumpkins and ate watermelon, packed up and weresoon on our way home. I'm sure the kids were happy and that they hadlearned something. It was probably the first time they had ever spenttwo days in close company of people from the USA and Australia, and Iknow that I certainly learnt a lot about kindness and communicationfrom my time with them.
If you have an opportunity, please go ona camp or some sort of international exchange activity. It will be agreat challenge, but an excellent chance to share fantastic experienceswith wonderful people.

Thank-you very much, Gail. Yousee people? Japan isn't just about drinking and getting laid - despiteme implying so very often in this blog. It's about sharing your timeand enriching the live's of others... heck... that's what we should bedoing anyways, regardless of what country you are in.

Somewhere wondering what the toilet situation was like,
Andrew Joseph
Today's blog title is sung by the late great Tiny Tim: FALSETTO